MORE MODERN MANNERS

Who has been naughty , who has been nice? The cheeze sez it's Cleveland puss , not "Cleveland plus". Pity to belabor such an insignificant point of grammar. Puss runs just like all the jolly former Clevelanders have , towards the brighter beckoning burbs...... An interesting humorous curse in Italian is so translated here as " go shit in your hat", So find the lumpy bald Caucasian male pimping parties in Lake County and go take a dump in his pork pie hat if you should find it laying about. Provide a nice chunk of brown for the cheerleader clown...... For the corporate bankers and other such usurious critters , another year of stomach grabbing quivers. You reap what you sow , and your up to your necks now. The white collar criminals among you grab prison garb and a plow .......Boss Dolan and all his little Indian Tribe , a new team logo and mascot the other's are jive. Your wahoo figure and slider are quite a drag , as long as wahoos around no world series flag.....For the two local free rags whose copy hardly matters , a crystal ball to predict which one will survive 2008 not fold with a splatter.....For all the inebriates and fools who visit downtown , a trip to the hoosegow complete with a psychopathic cellmate bearing a frown......for the chubby cheerleader in the pork pie hat , a new set of knee pads and mouthwash by the vat..... for the rock n' roll hall of fame gang ,whose aesthetics are nill , an aesthetic review board for your current review board which is swill..... for harvey pekar , Cleveland's official whiner , a permanent trip out west to join drew carey the former west sider.....for da p.d. the moniker minister of propaganda for Northeast Ohio we bestow , an invitation to move the rest of your quilting bee to deadly biddulph road....for wcpn , an industrial sized box of condoms and ky jelly to ease , the corporate violation of our public air waves and prevention of venereal radio disease. Book Selling Time! Bad poetry is the flavor of the day , so some real poetry will serve as a cure all. May we suggest our personal favorite poet of the second half of the 20th century Wallace Stevens COLLECTED POEMS , finely bound in a modern leather binding , and suitable for a gift at this Christmas season. Best wishes to all the Cleveland residents who have a little less on their plates this season , if you are in need of a book or two gratis for gifts please visit our storefront after telephoning first.Thank you Kim and John , my family and all the nice people who still call Cleveland home.

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